My good friend J summed up quiet nicely the overall self-loathing/self-important attitude that many people in St. Louis exhibit. His take is the people of St. Louis want to feel & live the big-city mentality, but as they constantly compare themselves to thriving creative meccas like Chicago and Minneapolis, they feel like they fall short. Therefore, they attempt to bolster their egos with self-importance and the result is judgement and meanness. J moved to St. Louis 10 years ago from Chicago, so he's gotten to experience these attitudes first-hand.
I come from a small town that resides in an even smaller state (population-wise), and while I've been to NYC, Minneapolis and Chicago, St. Louis is "big city" to me. It's as big as I need it to be - most of the quirkier films get showed here, there is a tremendous amount of worldly cuisine to be had, the music scene isn't bad, and I can get my fill of city-life and travel about 20 minutes to experience the quiet lull of the country when I need to.
I have also experienced the meanness that J speaks of - and I believe that, for some people, it stems from that big-city comparison. I do think it's an attempt to make up for the insignificance they feel.
We cannot compare ourselves to Chicago, any less than Chicago can compare itself to NYC. We all offer different things to different people, some more than others. I'm not sure why we can't be satisfied with what we are, which is a large midwestern metropolis that's grown tremendously from what it used to be even 20 years ago. And I know this as I moved here 20 years ago.
Let's break this down to what has changed/grown in the last 20 years:
1. We now have newer neighbrhoods in the city that, while they've always been there, are now inhabited and thriving - The Grove, Lafayette Square, Benton Park are a few that immediately come to mind.
2. Our dining options have quintupled (probably more) - we've got some of the best fusion, burger bars, tapas, and international restaurants in the midwest. The Vine, Aya Sofia, Modesto, Sub Zero, Everest to name a few...
3. Our melting pot is overflowing - we have the largest Bosnian populations in the country, and they've proven to be very good neighbors in my book. And let's not discount the growing population of hispanics, Vietnamese, Koreans, Africans, and South Americans. I know I'm leaving many out...
4. The Loft district - even though it's somewhat stilted now due to the economic debacle, the downtown area is much more populated than 20 years ago, which makes for a somewhat safer downtown (safety in numbers and all that).
That all said, I wish some folks who find it necessary to let out the rude would reel it back in. Everytime I visit Chicago, NYC, KC or Memphis, there's a satisfaction and easy-going nature that exudes from it's inhabitants. People are generally friendly, laid-back and less concerned with how they measure up. Since I'm not native to St. Louis, I'm not sure what can be done at this point - perhaps it's ingrained too deeply in the psyche of the natives to let go. Glad I can say I've yet to be infected with this mentality. I'm a happier person for it.
5 comments:
Compared to my town of 900, St. Louis is a mega-city to me! lol...and you need to add Iranians on the list - there are TONS in St. Louis.
I haven't encountered too much attitude here, but then again, I don't have any other big city experience to compare it to.
PS - Are you all moved in???
St. Louis is navigated mostly by automobile, which creates an insulated, impersonal experience. People know who they know, and anyone else is an obstacle or non-entity. It's easy for a person to flip the bird when they're driving past someone else; The same person might think twice when they're fighting for a space on the train home, especially when that person realizes the same people ride that train home every day...
Face to face contact encourages civility, at least among the sane. There's not enough of it in St. Louis.
Great post. I too am not a native and haven't understood the vibe as well.
Mags, didn't you get enough attitude at RT? :-)
GBA, you make a good point. Not enough human interaction can prevent a level of civility that's welcoming. Perhaps that's why larger cities like NYC and Chicago, where people rely on public transportation more often than not, get that connection and honor it.
David, where are you from originally?
Born in Houston, raised in Kansas/Atlanta
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